Thursday, January 16, 2003

this is a great story from Tony Black. he emailed it to me for posting. without further adieu, Mr. Black...

query aimed at james arwood. should we tell the one about the night outside QB's part2, Paul Stanley(?) was playing a set of 60-70's covers inside the bar, we were standing outside shootingtheshitfantastic. You had been explaining to some VI coeds how it is that music played with a lefthanded guitar DOESNOT come out backwards AND, its not any more difficult to produce notes or chords. A tall and giacometti-slender young lady walked by and some chainsmoking rednecks cousins(not us) oogled her. Earl-cousin one said "she's so damn thin you could use her as a toothpick." Earl-cousin two laughed so hard his mouth opened and revealed, surprise, very few teeth with which to exorcise striations of cooked or raw flesh from between, for example. At which point we looked at each other and snickered our college-matriculating hilljack snickers. when suddenly paul stanley(what was his real name? who cares) appeared and was trying to get you into a fight (you were trying on your gandhi-as-hockey-goalie-face because you didnt want to lose you drinking and dart throwing privileges). i remember playing the UN peace broker role(maddie albright in frayed cords and flannel shirt). Standing between you two(not U2 or any cover bands) and saying "ignore him james, cause you'll go to jail and he will STILL look like paul stanley" at which point he lunged, or fainted? in your general direction. in a reflexive motion i picked him up by his neck and dropped him to the pavement? a crowd stirred, tie-dyed boys ran inside for back up. bouncers appeared and we heard a car door slam out on walnut street in a westerly direction. we all sighed in deep amusement as the slightly wounded(the back of his shirt had soaked up anonymous random spittle). Cool hair sensation rode off into the 2am smoggy glow of our humble burg, the the athensga of the middlin' appalachians. ?  we laughed so hard we vomited to satisfy bill edwards sick and twisted whims? thats when jack kerouac walked in and...thats all i got to say about that.?


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