Wednesday, February 09, 2005

gay PIMP exposed as WHITE HOUSE reporter -- GANNON, not his real name

WASHINGTON  -  Yesterday,  infamous gay pimp Jeff Gannon was exposed for his secret double life as a White House reporter.   Known for his popular escort service websites,  (, and  many of Gannon's customers were shocked at this revelation.

'I couldn't believe my ears when I heard the news,'  said long-time customer Everett Plemish,  'He was the best gay pimp of them all.   He had so much going for him.   I don't know why he decided to throw it all away as a member of the White House Press Corps.'

'He always had someone to fulfill my fantasy of the evening,  whether it was  'Navy Seal Nathan',  'Private Peter O'Tool'  or even  'Five-Star General Gary','  said Plemish,  'On nights when all his Johns were servicing other customers,  Jeff himself would even make a special trip just for me.'

'He was a great pimp,  but he was one of the best prostitutes I've ever had,'  he said,  'Well,  I had no idea how much of a prostitute he really was.'

'Oh my god,'  said Plemish,  'Just the thought that I licked the anus of someone who at the time was constantly kissing President Bush's ass...   It just makes me feel dirty all over.   Promiscuous types like myself don't usually care,  but for some reason I feel totally betrayed'

Working under a pseudonym,  Gannon was infamous for his inquisitive,  pointed questions at White House Press Briefings,  such as  'Why isn't Congress acting to defend marriage?'  and  'Isn't President Bush just the greatest?'"


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